I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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