Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
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