end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
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