I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
