i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize