Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize
