where am i from again
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
