R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
