Your tits are I can't wait for
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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