ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize
