Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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