she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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