Texts From Last Night

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  (217): View more from Illinois

  I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?

  (847): View more from Illinois

  haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.

  (217): View more from Illinois

  ... oops

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  (217): I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity? (847): haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that. (217): ... oops http://tfl.nu/gsy7
  Replies (4) Good night (1124) Bad night (479)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes

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  (407): I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes http://tfl.nu/atny
  Replies (1) Good night (681) Bad night (1045)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer

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  (570): Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer http://tfl.nu/4zlr
  Replies (30) Good night (781) Bad night (2723)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.

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  (908): btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life. http://tfl.nu/rg12
  Replies (10) Good night (5214) Bad night (751)
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  (308): View more from Nebraska

  I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  but it's kind of a high honor.

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  (308): I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly. (402): but it's kind of a high honor. http://tfl.nu/hn5k
  Replies (30) Good night (1291) Bad night (5895)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  his penis was the training wheels of my sex life

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  (610): his penis was the training wheels of my sex life http://tfl.nu/y4t8
  Replies (16) Good night (4639) Bad night (1201)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits

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  (615): of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits http://tfl.nu/a8zr
  Replies (29) Good night (1581) Bad night (7584)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.

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  (715): I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record. http://tfl.nu/1ug5
  Replies (12) Good night (761) Bad night (2794)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.

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  (314): Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober. http://tfl.nu/dut2
  Replies (5) Good night (1460) Bad night (517)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!

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  (509): It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me! http://tfl.nu/u8n7
  Replies (2) Good night (1113) Bad night (453)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there

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  (501): Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there http://tfl.nu/0rjt
  Replies (7) Good night (1057) Bad night (467)
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  (787): View more from Puerto Rico

  I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.

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  (787): I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers. http://tfl.nu/zztx
  Replies (1) Good night (559) Bad night (836)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong

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  (410): Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong http://tfl.nu/3qt9
  Replies (2) Good night (672) Bad night (225)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it

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  (780): Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it http://tfl.nu/2d0a
  Replies (1) Good night (769) Bad night (215)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.

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  (602): Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy. http://tfl.nu/ej69
  Replies (1) Good night (462) Bad night (336)

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