problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
