just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
