Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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