He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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