Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
