K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
