paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
40s are totally the cure
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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