no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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