So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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