He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
