Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
