I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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