i don't like sucking hair
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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