I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful