We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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