dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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