Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Oh god it's open bar.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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