She's JV to your varsity
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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