dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
