My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
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I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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