yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Randomize
