everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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