I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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