Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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