So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I would ride that face into the sunset
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
