Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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