I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Randomize