Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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