That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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