dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Randomize
