He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
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