I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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