God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
