Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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