Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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