I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship