are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
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she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
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end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!