I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
