your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize
