We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
she peed on how many people?
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
